Food for Thought

As usual my blogs are a dump of information dying to get out of my head.  It's not meant to win any gramatical awards as I do not proofread.


This one may piss a few people off, but hey...Shrugs.



Every day I wake up to a different article about why it's so hard for educated black women or men or whomever to find love.  Sustainable love.

Well, I'm here to give answers.... actually my opinion, but that's what blogs are for right?  Opinions!?


I tend to simplify things so I'll simplify it even more right now.  Why do I feel It's so hard for sustained love in the black community?  There's no Need!

-

-

-

Ok, I wanted the simplicity to seep in a bit before I elaborated on my thoughts.  First thought is "sustained."  Lust, infatuation, and wants are easy...but is it sustainable?  I want to drill down on that thought...Sustainable.  We all come from different walks of life.  Some of us were brought up in a two-parent household, others were raised by one parent, some of us were raised by our grandparents and so on.  This affects us in good as well as bad ways and in the end, a little favor is still needed!  The favor to not only come in contact with what is beneficial but the favor enough to recognize it and they recognize you!  A pretty tall task!  Yes I know to all my highly religious and spiritual people, God will provide...Hallaluyer and Amen!  But what if you read the wrong signals?  This blog is to open the door that is already wide open!  Please join!

SUSTAINED NEED

As I stated earlier, we are all from various parts of life.  If you are from a two-parent household it's quite possible that you would look for someone similar to one of your parents?  yes no?  If you grew up with your parents yelling, then you may think it's ok to yell at your mate?  Yes No?  You can run through your head the different scenarios, but a sustained need is key.  Value, Need, desires, fulfillment even in the darkest times.  Are your expectations too high for mere mortals?  I mean we all have flaws.

Check it out.  I read an article the other day about how black women were "dumbing down or settling for less to have a mate."  What does that look like or even mean?  Does that mean you are looking for less successful men?  What happened to the guys you kicked to the curb on your way up the ladder?  What happened to the guys that you skipped over because someone else was showing you interest?  Insert a tear....

Has anyone ever wondered why there's never an article written about how hard it is for a man to find a woman?  Men are wired differently.  We have different struggles.  And most men won't put their issues on front street.

Here's the thing, and this is for men and women.  It is extremely difficult to find someone as you climb the success ladder whatever that looks like.  We are to busy working, traveling, doing us, or getting older and don't wanna put up with the bullshhh.  We've heard it all before right?

I think we've had it too easy.  Nobody wants to work through anything.  Everyone wants to rush as well.  You've been alive for 30 or 40 years but you expect someone to marry you after 1 month, 4 months a year?  Not saying it couldn't happen, but what are your odds on that being sustainable?  Hell if you can't fart in front of me, then how are we supposed to be together, together?  Now add in the fact that some people are on a timetable, then the fact that we have to understand who we are, and then damn it we just have to "Want to."

The more money we make the harder it is to find what we would consider as our equal.  And even then, as a man, the booty is getting thrown at us!  A successful man can look like a cross between Biggie and Lil Wayne and still have a baddie on his arm that will take care of him. I have to shake my own head at times, like wow.  The fact is we think differently.  Equality has made it to easy to find the next for each gender.  Everyone is expendable.  Sad but true.  Don't believe me?  Ask yourself this one question....That Ex that you thought you would spend the rest of your life with but are no longer with.  Do you still think about them?  If the answer is No, then you proved my point.


Anything that is worthwhile takes work.  But before the work, it's a Choice on both parties involved to do the work!  Stop thinking you're just going to be chosen by someone and fall into place!


Food for thought